This is the third and last series in the series about stopping the porn in one’s head, the fantasies and imaginations. Read the first two parts here:
https://pornaddictsjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2014/03/10/stopping-the-porn-in-my-head-pt-day-31/https://pornaddictsjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2014/03/13/stopping-the-porn-in-my-head-pt-2-day-32/
I
commit myself to understanding how I am
abusing the
body and how I am creating a defunct sexual expression by allowing myself to watch and
masturbate to
porn, to understand this by looking at the
consequences of my actions, by looking at what I have defined as sexual and relating that back to the
physical reality in participating in
communication with the opposite or same sex
I commit myself to reconnecting with the body by
giving myself
patience as I practice removing the images/
ideas/
thoughts/stimulus created from porn when they come up, forgiving myself in that moment, and understanding that if I am to continue with masturbating to images/
thoughts/ideas that I am only creating more of a
presence within the
mind and further
separating myself from the body
I commit myself to honouring the body as
life by stopping myself from participating in idea/images/thoughts when masturbating and if they come up while I am masturbating in
self honesty, stop, reassess my starting point, clear the starting point and if they remain
present, to stop myself from masturbating in that moment
I commit myself to treating the body with
respect by stopping my
relationship to believing that I need images in order to masturbate and then pushing beyond that belief within practicing and testing out masturbating without images and masturbating only with myself here
I commit myself to understanding what it is that I am doing to the body while I am masturbating to images or creating thoughts and ideas within the
mind based upon those images and what it is that I am telling the body through masturbating to the images meaning that what it is that I am showing the body in relation to only focusing on the images to get myself off and from this reassess my starting point within masturbating to images and give myself a clear understanding/realization of what I have accepted from myself
I commit myself to stopping the images of porn or of sexual attraction when they come up in the
mind, so meaning, when/as I am walking on the street and I am faced with a sexually provocative advertisement and I become aroused, I stop, I
breathe in the moment, I take the thought/idea/image here as myself and through
breathing remove and stop the
energy that is moving in that moment bring myself back here, meaning not influenced by the image, and re-direct myself within whatever task that I was doing in that moment
I commit myself to realizing
/seeing only an idea of what that image is representing and seeing/creating an idea of what/how I would like to
experience myself in relation to that IMAGE and that IMAGE is in no way related to the
physical movements of sex or the
physical body of another nor myself. So when/as I see an image that provokes sexual arousal I bring that sexual arousal in relation to the
physical reality and see if it holds up, if it doesn’t then I commit myself to in that moment let it go because it is not a
living embodiment of the
physical expression of the body that when I see an image that provokes sexual arousal within myself that I am
I commit myself to when/as I see an image and think about how I would approach the idea of the image to realize that I AM NOT THERE within the idea/image and thus I commit myself to bring myself back here to physical reality and direct myself in that moment here with myself in/as the body and not allow the image/idea to direct the physical body as I am not a
slave to the
mind nor the thoughts that pop up within the
mind in relation to sexual arousal and in this I commit myself to allow the only sexual arousal to be from here within the physical, meaning if I am
touched by a person and physical arousal exists then I allow it, if the body is telling me that I am aroused then I allow it, in this I commit myself to remain self honest within seeing where/how the arousal comes up and if it is from an idea or
energy that I stop it and release myself from the energy
I commit myself to realigning myself with the body by working with
masturbation with myself here without images running through the mind, without being
stimulated by images and without ideas of what to expect or ideas pertaining to what turns me on and in this to move myself unconditionally with the body exploring what the body in fact likes within being
touched and explored and how to move myself in equality and
oneness with the body, realizing that I am the body and the body is me thus meaning that I can move myself within the body without judgements or
expectations of myself in relation to
masturbation and simply explore myself with the body here in physical touch